E este calor, heim!

By
Vassil Oliveira
-
337
1362

Calor demais!

Pode ser que o dia esquente mais, quem vai saber hoje em dia?

Houve um tempo em que o tempo estava definido em tempo de jabuticaba, de festa junina, maravilhoso tempo das férias com sol e vento pra subir papagaio, e tempo das chuvas com hora imaginada, porque era para a terra ficar molhada e ter saudade de colheita. Isso acabou.

Acabou o mundo de antigamente, e o novo mundo é uma velha indagação: e agora?

Não é que morro de saudades de outros tempos. Porque tem meu tio que tem saudades de tempos mais antigos ainda, e nenhum apreço pelo que me toma de lágrimas com suas lembranças tão, mas tão… Bem, me deixem suspirar em paz.

(Meu tio carrega uma lágrima de estimação para quando lembra, porque a lembrança é a sua esperança. Só assim ele tem futuro. [Eu aprendi com ele a soluçar sempre que ouço falar de velha palhoça.] {E tem o seu paiol, que me canta Tião Carreiro e sorrimos. Tião está mais vivo do que nunca.})

A bem dizer, o tempo dentro da gente é que muda tudo, e muda de um jeito que parece não combinar com a flor da pele. Aí a flor fica sem água, seca, ou floresce temporã, sei lá, a flor da pele fica tão sensível que passa a não perceber a sensibilidade que está dentro, querendo sair, a flor da pele fica sem jardim.

E este tempo aqui se mistura com o tempo dos outros, produzindo mais confusão ainda, e sempre deixa de ser o mesmo, para ser outro, embora continuando a ser da gente, dentro e fora, ou de dentro pra fora, ou o contrário, avesso de tudo. Quando falamos que o tempo pirou, quem pirou de verdade?

Falo isso não é pra fazer você perder seu tempo. É pra dizer que estou com tempo demais dentro de mim. E se você não foi cuidar da sua vida, deixando-se em paz de mim, sabe o que estou dizendo.

Bem dentro corre o tempo de antes, o tempo de agora em desacordo com o que já era, um tempo inexplicável que não decide se precede ou sucede, e o tempo que nem sei ainda.

Este de agora é definitivamente o meu tempo. E o meu tempo é que faz todo o resto ficar como está. Sim, o meu tempo junta passado, presente e futuro e sai por aí criando caso e confusão. Anota o que vem à cabeça e solta no ar.

Por isso não sei se o calor deste instante em Goiânia vai aumentar ou não. Porque depende de mim. E eu não sou de gastar tempo medindo realidade – mesmo se estivesse na Rússia! Quero conhecer a Rússia e andar de trem no gelo.

Está com calor? Coloque uma capa de chuva e vá ver o que tem na esquina. A esquina, como a terra dos meus avós, tem todos os tempos da história pra contar. Tá nem aí. Agora quero ver!

Publicado primeiramente em Sagres Online.

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